pity me

ok, so i got a husband who lives half a continent away.
i got a kitten with grand mal seizures.
i got a brother who is sleeping on my couch and has a broken down car.
i have a long ass week ahead of me and cant even BEGIN to be excited about tomorrow being friday and me not having to work.
i have a friend who has so much love to give and no one appreciates how amazing she is. (no one, except us)
i have a friend who is in so much physical pain that she wants to scream all day
i have parents who need to sit down for 17 hours and say all the things they have needed to say for 32 years.
i have a brother who loves me and i dont know why, since i was hardly there for him.
i have a sister who is experiencing a little difficulty with her pregnancy.
AND i have issues WITH her pregnancy.

any questions?
good.

meanwhile... i have decided that i am tired of making Pity Me lists. i mean, at any given time i could make you a list of 5 shitty things going on in my life. granted sometimes they are WAY shitty. sometimes they are moderately shitty. and some days they are but a fart on the Cosmic Shit Scale. and i am tired of it. i used to be fun. i used to be giddy. i used to not need to make a Pity Me list.

so. i am going to change it. right here, right now. at 4:45 on a thursday, september 9th.
ready.
yeah, me either.

but i am going to try. i have a customer who i believe is a preacher/priest/deacon/bishop, shit i don't know. he's a man of the cloth. no not burlap... the "holy cloth" ... but enough about his clothes. he comes in a few weeks ago and asks me to give him a list of 3 meaningful things that happened to me yesterday.
i said: i got to talk to my father-in-law, which some days is a miracle.
and that my husband told me he "loved me so much he didnt have the words to express it" to which our Holy Friend said, "what, is he illiterate?" thay annoyed me so i said, "you cant have the third one then. if you want more, then i will give you 4 next time"

and he left. he came in last week and said, "you owe me 4."
i said:
#1 my husband has a new job
#2 my father is in town to visit
#3 my sick kitten has survived another day
#4 my baby brother moved in with me
and i even gave him a fifth one: that i dont remember what it was. but i had a big list.

so i think i will make a list of 3 meaningful things that happened during my day at the end of my blog from now on. it may help. we shall see.




#1 i got to hug my mommie and tell her that i love her.
#2 i talked to my father last night and told him that i love him.
#3 i talked to my best friend last night and made her laugh AND told her that i love her.
#4 i talked to my husband several times and told him that i love him. he made ME laugh which is his mission every day.

see, i guess that wasnt so hard.
now what to do about the sick kitten. that one breaks my heart the most. because there is nothing i can do about it. i mean, i would love to be able to see my husband and tellhim that i love him, but i have 4 more weeks until i get that. but i am eternally thankful that i have such a wonderful husband that has made such a huge sacrifice for the betterment of his family. i am amazed by him everyday.

wow. i feel better.
dammit.