lady

i have the best mom.

she is my ultimate best friend. and for that i am eternally grateful. when i was growing up, my mom always told me to "never do anything you cant tell me" and that i "can always tell me everything". which meant, she better be willing to hear the bad with the good. and she usually was. the bad part of all that was that i can't lie to her. after about the 3rd day, i would go to her with that sheepish look on my face and say, "ama, i need to tell you something." and she always had that look like she knew already.

my friend, A, would always give me grief because of how close i am to my mom. i can still hear her saying, "CUT THE CORD, ALREADY" but i couldn't. i am a mama's girl. always will be. and it wasn't until she got remarried and moved out here to SC that we were able to redefine our roles with one another. since she was unmarried for 12 years, she and i became very dependent on each other. for support, for friendship, for listening, and for guidance. once she got married, she didn't need me to fill all of those roles as much. and that was very hard for me. and once i got married i realized why.

when she and my dad moved to SC, i moved 6 weeks after them. i had never lived more than 30 MINUTES from her for my entire life. in less than a month, i will be moving more than 20 HOURS away from her. and that thought scares me. not in the "something bad could happen" kind of way, but in the "only a hug from my mommie will fix this" kind of way. she is notorious for dropping by my work and bringing me stuff, whether it's a batch of her famous shepherd's pie, or a bag of mint m&m's because she knows i will squeal with joy upon receiving them. (they are hard to find)
this is the woman who helped me move into my first apartment BY MYSELF and went out and bought me plates, a shower curtain, my favorite kind of tea, silverware, knick-knacks, and my favorite kind of m&ms. and put it all up while i was at work.
she is the woman who called me one sunday morning to come show me her engagement ring and we squealed like little girls.
she is the woman who went out and bought me Color Wonder fingerpaint paper because i "just HAD to have it". this is the woman who selflessly wrote a letter to a friend of mine, whom she has never met, and bared her soul and experiences, because my friend was going through a very tough time and my mom had some insight on it. who does that?

my mom does.

how did i get so lucky?

i am going to miss living close to her SO much.

when my family was sitting around playing a board game last year, one of the questions was, "if you had only 2 words to put on her headstone, what would they be??"
my answer was:

She Loved.


and she does.