customer appreciation

the best thing heard at work, from a customer, today:




"she couldn't pour piss out of a boot, if there were instructions on the heel"

SOUL PATROL!!!

GUESS WHO ELSE,

BESIDES DAVID HASSELHOFF,

WAS SOBBING TEARS OF JOY

LAST NIGHT????

YEAH, IT WAS

THIS GIRL!

more disturbing than...

i was going to say japanese p0rn, but i don't need all of THOSE hits/visitors to my site!


but THIS: LifeGem

FREAKS ME THE FUCK OUT!!!!



click on the link first.
if you can't access it, i will explain it.

"The LifeGem® is a certified, high-quality diamond created from thecarbon of your loved one...
as a memorial to their unique life.
as a symbol of your personal and precious bond.
Whether you've lost a loved one or simply want to celebrate your love, the LifeGem diamond provides a way to embrace your loved one’s memory day by day. The LifeGem® is the most unique and timeless tribute available for creating a testimony to their unique life. Your LifeGem memorial will offer comfort and support when and where you need it, and provide a lasting memory that endures just as a diamond does. Forever."

no for real.

can you imagine?

"hey nancy, nice earrings. are they new?"

"why yes, they are my mom."

"they were your mom's?"

"no, they ARE my mom."

yeah. nuh-uh. and just imagine if you LOST the jewelry.

like leaving it by the bathroom sink in a hotel.

or when presenting the ring, in a dessert, it gets eaten...

or falls off in the ocean.

or gets stolen.

i think we need to create a whole new Level of Wrongness for this one.

"Like the memory of a loved one, a diamond lasts forever."

please forgive me for my geekitude

but i am SO going to E3 next year.


it's like Gamer's Mecca.

GeekCon.

Pasty DungeonMasters Expo.



it's like a Trekkie Convention, but without the Trekkies and with the COOL stuff like VIDEO GAMES!!!!! and computer dorks. and Draenii


it's a Nintendo, Playstation, X-Box, GameCube, Wii, PC ORGY!



oh yeah. i'm goin.

rising from the ashes

let's just say i have some crap going on.

ok, by "crap" i mean "SHIT"


big. stinky. shit.



but let's also say that i know who i am
and how strong i am...

and i can come through this like a phoenix.

idolize

in case i haven't said it lately,

i

taylor hicks

quote for the day

"there was a drink parade. and I was Grand Marshal!"


-from In Her Shoes by Jennifer Weiner

quote for the day

"I was going to change my shirt, but I changed my mind instead." - Winnie the Pooh

welcome to The Suck

laying in bed last night... as i was headed off to Sleepy Land, i realized that my posts recently have been lackluster.

i owe you guys an apology. i suck.

but i realized part of it is that i don't want to use this medium to bitch about the stuff going on. i know, "it's MY blog, i can do what i want". but really, enough of you hear me bitch on a regular basis. do you really want to READ about it too?

so here is the laundry list of what's been going on.

• work is fine. (that's always nice, huh?)
• my mom is going in for some bionic eye surgery in about a week. (i am being nervous, she is being excited... it works better that way)
• eddie's dad has HAD surgery lately. he had kidney stones smashed to bits and some cancerous skin removed from his left shoulder. but he is repairing quite nicely, i hear. and he's kinda living with his girlfriend and her 3 kids. (don't get me started)
• my father got married on the 22nd. and it wasn't until the minister announced them "husband and wife" that i realized that not only was Ian getting step-siblings, but I AM TOO! (duh) and later on, during the reception, i realized that i got a step-mother in the deal too. (at least i'm cute... not so smart sometimes... i blame the wine.) we like her/them and i wish them a lifetime of bliss.
• my grandmother is in a nursing home now. (she has see-sawed between death and life for about a month now. we all think she has a truckload of unresolved shit to work out before she will finally let go. i just hope she can get it all worked out to go peacefully. i know she's tired.)
• did i mention that eddie FLEW US TO DALLAS? well, he has a friend who owns his own plane and he let eddie fly us from amarillo to wichita falls. (no, he didn't take off or land, but STILL)
• eddie and i are still on the fence about moving to albuquerque. (it could come down to the way the wind blows on a tuesday to get that figured out.)
• i've been on a Candida Detox diet for about 7 weeks. and so far, i've lost (and managed to keep off) 10 pounds. i cheated a little last week and had wendy's. MMMMMM... biggie fries. basically i can't have sugar, yeast, or anything fermented. (there's really a HUGE list of shit I! CAN'T! HAVE!) but i think i miss beer the most. and it's kinda a lifestyle change more than a diet... *sigh*
• our new kitten is the Cutest KittyBoy EVER. (no, i swear)
• i have spent a lot of time with my aunt and my cousins and have really enjoyed it. it's like we actually are a family again.. instead of "WOW, you got big"

and that's about it.